There are few moments in a persons life that can be more transformative than being with the dying. Typically, those that are ready to die and have prepared their hearts, can speak with such clarity and reason to the things that really matter. They can expose the trivial pursuits of life to make room for things that really matter; Moments in time that are filled with love.
I had the privilege of giving the eulogy at Susan Caravan’s funeral. Susan was somewhat of an aunt to me. She was my mother’s best friend and we spent lots of time with their family growing up. I have vivid memories of visiting their family. It was both a blessing and a curse for me. As I was prone to evoke the ire of my mother, when visiting with Auntie Susan it was as if my mother had just multiplied. One could call this multi-directional discipline :)
I was fortunate to spend some time with her in the hospice, reconnecting and hearing her voice again. The conversation was profound. Susan was in a place where she was ready to die, and as a result was able to show great courage for the journey before her. Wondering if she would be able to walk in heaven, I reminded her that dancing would be the norm. She quite liked the gesture. We talked about family, told stories and were mutually blessed. I came away from the encounter changed and encouraged. Changed because she, perhaps unknowingly, reoriented me around my mortality and what really matters… encouraged because we all will eventually face the same journey. We can take comfort from those who model the courage we all need when our time is near.
Susan was a great woman, strong and determined to raise five children, mostly on her own. Not without struggle, Susan worked tirelessly to be there for her entire family that included five children, twelve grand children, and two great grand children. She modelled the persistence that eventually emerged in her children to navigate through life and become good people. She will be missed greatly and remembered well.